Sometimes the beauty is easy, sometimes you don't have to try at all, sometimes you can hear the wind blow in a handshake, sometimes there's poetry written right on the bathroom wall
And it's bad that I took that second look, I guess I'm an open book, you know I didn't really intend to embrace you that long, but then again I wasn't the only one holding on" -Ani
So yeah, I have some ex-boyfriend issues. Is it wrong to be in love with who someone used to be? He changed, and in changing pulled away, and by pulling in the wrong direction I went crazy. And faced with the decision to fall completely apart, or let him go, I had to let him go. And it was one of the hardest things I've had to do. But the love is still there. I guess so is the pain, but I can feel the love more. Its the love which sneaks into my dreams and recreates a perfect relationship. But what I forget is how unperfect it really was. How he put me down and squeezed my breasts when he was angry so hard that they were an almost constant color of yello, brown, and red.
Some day I will have a functional relationship, I can feel it. But it's hard to let go when the feelings you wake up with are ones for him. It's the things I dont have control over that get me.